On this week’s Book Journeys episode, Angela’s guest is Karen Anderson, who wrote The Peaceful Daughter’s Guide to Separating from a Difficult Mother.
From the start, author Karen revealed that her book was the result of her having experienced a difficult relationship with her mother as well as an offshoot of a class that she created for her master coach certification program. She admitted that she didn’t see herself writing the book at first and that the idea actually came from a friend who saw the obvious.
Karen went on to explain the the book is partly her story and partly about her relationship with her mother, having been emotionally enmeshed in a way that was unfavorable to her. The book covers the time when she began to un-enmesh herself prior to her writing of it. Her Master Coach Certification Project was crucial to finding the solution to her maternal relationship problem, and when she saw how well the system worked for her, she decided that she should teach it to other women who were in the same situation as she was.
Karen’s book combines her experiences, the lessons that she’s learned, and exercises that combine to allow her readers to start their own process towards a solution to peacefully separate from a difficult mother. Karen specifically wrote for women who are aware there’s an issue with their mother and who’ve gone through therapy, worked out some of the issues and who are ready to take the next step and move on. It serves as a bridge between therapy and moving forward and doing what one needs to do for oneself. She says her book is really about “you” and not “your mother.” She says, it’s “about taking responsibility for yourself and the things that are necessary for you to redefine who you are and what you are in life.” The book is for women who know there is a next step but just don’t know how to handle the situation or where to start.
The Peaceful Daughter’s Guide to Separating from a Difficult Mother is now adjunct and strategic to Karen’s coaching program and it’s become so much more than the typical worksheets. In writing it, she emphasized the importance of having an objective and a second set of eyes to check the output and provide encouragement. The book is like a second voice that supplements her real voice when she speaks directly to people and it’s also a validation that she could write about her experiences without being affected of a lingering fear of being “destroyed” by her own mother.
Towards the end of the interview, she said, “I knew there was fear, but what’s really fascinating is that embracing the fear and being okay with the fact my mother may try to destroy me, has actually increased the amount of love that I feel for my mother.” Now, that’s peaceful.
DOWNLOAD the PDF: Karen Anderson – Book Journeys Author Interview – Jan 7 2016
Next week, watch out for Angela’s interview with another exciting author.